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WOW Fitness Team

Tuesday 19 April 2016

When Something Hits You Right In The FEELS...

They say there are no brakes on the “Feel Train”…
“Feels” is a shorthand for the word “feelings” that is used to describe an intense emotional response, such as sadness, excitement or awe. The term is also commonly associated with the phrase “right in the feels,” which indicates that something has deeply affected the speaker.
WOW Fact – It’s a painful experience to be deeply connected with a man/woman, only to find him/her pulling away and losing interest.
Have you ever been with a man/woman who seemed to really like/love you, only to begin distancing himself/herself and saying he/she wasn’t ready for a commitment? It takes a special kind of WOW deep emotional attraction for a man/woman to feel compelled to keep a man/woman in his/her life with a shared promise of committed intentions in the future.
I have had so many conversations recently with people asking me about relationship issues that I have felt compelled to write about this topic, in reality, this topic affects us all!
“The course of true love never did run smooth” William Shakespeare, A Midsummer Night’s Dream
WOW Fact – How right Shakespeare was!!!
Stress is often a big factor in relationship problems, whether it’s the demands of work, bringing up children or challenges posed by redundancy, retirement etc Most damaging of all for many relationships are the after-effects of an affair.
WOW Fact – but just as certain behaviours can jeopardise a relationship, others can strengthen it, including:
  • Trust
  • Share decision-making
  • Intimacy – physical, emotional and psychological
  • Sexual attraction
  • Investing time and energy in working at the relationship
  • Emotional support for each other
  • Positive actions, whether this is giving your partner a hug, being ready to listen when they need to talk or even bringing them a cup of tea
  • Clear communication
  • Negotiation skills
  • Tolerance, flexibility and patience
I dislike the word ‘baggage’ however most people use this word in terms of a relationship. So if I were to say what “Louis Vuitton” did you bring to your relationship what would you reply? In my experience, people have strong like bull views about everything from how the household should be run to the kind of sex life they expect. WOW Fact – lots of this expensive baggage comes from upbringing and previous relationships and also men and women often have very different approaches to the various issues that crop up in a relationship.
It’s crucial that you have an honest discussion with your partner about your expectations for the relationship. Who’s going to clean the house? Who is responsible for childcare? How will you handle the finances? How much ‘personal’ time should you each have? How often should you expect to have sex? What are your respective views on fidelity, commitment and trust?
If you’re lucky, lucky, lucky, lucky, you’ll agree on most things but most likely, you’ll both need to compromise.
Many relationships suffer through sheer neglect, through simply not spending enough quality time together and this is when the ‘negative police’ creep in and revel in dreary routine and familiar disagreements! Always think back to the things you used to enjoy as a couple – going out to the cinema, staying in bed till noon, buying each other little gifts – START DOING THEM AGAIN – plan ahead make a date: just as you did when you first got together.
WOW Tip - delve beneath the surface and discover the truth about what a meaningful relationship would look like for you. Try not to get caught up in illusions created by others that do not reflect your own reality, needs, and desires
In a nutshell, some think love can be measured by the amount of butterflies in their tummy. Others think love can be measured in bunches of flowers, or by using the words ‘forever’. But love can only truly be measured by actions. It can be a small WOW thing, such as ironing a shirt for a person or peeling an orange for a person or washing the car for the person you love because you know they don’t have time or you know they don’t like doing it.
 “We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can't just accept it and leave it in the cupboard or just think it's going to get on by itself. You've got to keep watering it. You've got to really look after it and nurture it”.  John Lennon
Sonia Cullington / Live, Laugh, Love Coach

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