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Monday 12 September 2011

WOW Emma...How in heavens name are YOU?...We have missed YOU!

Hi Sonia,

Been a long while since my last update, and my last weigh in too... Not to mention gym visit!

Time to be honest; I don't want to lie to any of you. After all, you wouldn't be reading this if you didn't understand what I've been through, and how I'm feeling.
I think I saw Sonia about 2 weeks before I went to Majorca, back in July. Might have even been longer! Between my last weigh in and now, I have put on weight. I don't know how much - In fact I am quite scared about the fact that I've done so. I was so proud of myself, and happier with how I looked, and now I feel like I've disappointed myself and let myself down. It’s very disheartening.
Don't get me wrong, I am happy (over the moon in fact!) with my life at the moment. I'm happy with my boyfriend, and we have a great time, he is amazing :-)
It's ME I am not happy with. I know Jay likes me for me, and not what size I am, and for that I am truly grateful. But what I don't want to do, is put on so much weight that I hate myself, and feel uncomfortable around him. Plus, (excitedly!!!!!) we've booked 8 days in Portugal at the end of March, (we'll be there for my birthday and our 1 year anniversary!) so it would be fantastic to lose 3 stone before then, I have 6 months!!!!

I am seeing Sonia tomorrow night, and am DREADING getting on those scales, I really am. More so than working out for the first time in about 12 weeks!! I feel like I've let her down - she was so supportive of me and helping me out, requesting we meet up for a weigh in, and what have I done? Was too busy to see Sonia, started eating carbs again and ruined all my work. I know as soon as I cut the carbs down and start the exercise again, the weight will start to drop off once more - but getting back in to it after so long... god I'd forgotten quite how hard it is!! I have been saying, on Monday I'll start again, after this weekend I'll start again, after tomorrow I'll start again - and all those cliché’s. But now I realise it is time, and I need to stop kidding around!!

So anyway, I'll let you all know how I get on - and you can see my dreaded weight gain for yourselves!!!

Love Emma xx

I have never given up on Emma, over the summer I have kept in touch with her but she always had things on, I even offered her a spot on TV to talk about her weight loss journey, she just couldn't make it...after our meeting tomorrow I know she will get back on track! I will post her weight on the blog tomorrow night...Soniaxxx

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